Since his 2006 debut, “Port Of Miami,” Rick Ross has become one of the biggest pop stars in rap history. But his rise to fame is definitely not due to his lyrical or technical capacities. It's not beyond the self-appointed Boss to rhyme the word “money” with the word “money,” for example, and he happily flaunts tautologies like “A life sentence is a life sentence,” as he does on the song “Cross That Line.”
Ross's elevation is the result of his well-marketed brutishness and rawness, and his ability to portray himself as a larger-than-life gangster with an insatiable appetite for brand name clothes, expensive cars, street violence and women.
In short, Rick Ross is an exceptional bragger. He's not an absurdist; he's no Lil Wayne, Lil B or Riff Raff, but he is the kind of rapper who, in one of his only “serious” songs ever, “I'm Only Human” from 2009's “Trilla,” raps the following: “Got a deadbeat dad, but he far from dead / He never knew chocolate milk make you fart real bad.”
This same flair for the ridiculous comes across in his boasts. To mark the occasion of Ross's fifth studio album, “God Forgives, I Don't,” released in late July on his own Maybach Music Group label, we offer a list of the rapper's 50 Most Ridiculous Boasts. If you think we left out something important, tell us.

50. "Vacation to Haiti, it nearly broke my heart / Seeing kids starve, I thought about my Audemar."
From: “Rich Off Cocaine” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
49. "Poof! A hundred mill, David Copperfield."
From “Black Magic” on Maybach Music Group, Self Made Vol. 2
48. "I'm hot until the day a day freezes."
From “Live Fast Die Young” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
47. "My shit white as Miss Vanna."
From “Where My Money (I Need That)” on Rick Ross, Port Of Miami
46. "A nigga cheese dipping, I like my nachos hot."
From “MMG Untouchable” on Rick Ross, Rich Forever
45. "I'm bad, magazines up the ass."
From “I'm Bad” on Rick Ross, Port Of Miami
44. "American Idol, I got fans like Fantasia / Read between the lines, or yo ass like Fantasia."
From “Speedin'” on Rick Ross, Trilla
43. "Started with a biscuit, now I got a loaf / Hoes want a slice, I wanna tell her no."
From “This Is The Life” on Rick Ross, Trilla

42. "My dick a big stretch and quick to tell a bitch to fetch."
From “Yacht Club” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
41. "My car's a virgin, first one to hit it."
From “Lay Back” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
40. "Welcome to the mall, here's your first pinky ring / 20 karats, 20 grand, Paris Hilton, linen bed."
From “Hit U From The Back” on Rick Ross, Port Of Miami
39. "Got the club rocking like a fucking boat / I'm the pirate of this ship, all you mates got to go."
From “Live Fast Die Young” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
38. "I'm higher than a lear, Aaliyah."
From “Maybach Music” on Rick Ross, Trilla
37. "I'm a kamikaze in a Maserati / I'm John Gotti, got my own army."
From “All Birds” on Maybach Music Group, Self Made Vol. 2
36. "I'm 24/7 like IHOP."
From “Streetlife” on Rick Ross, Port Of Miami

35. "I spent a milli on the car, it come alive / Never feed it after dark, gotta treat it like a Gremlin / It's a multimillion dollar motherfucker in it."
From “I'm Not A Star” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
34. "I kick Bapes, only wear 'em once / Red Pradas, strawberry blunts."
From “Hoodtails” on Bizzy Bone, Ruthless
33. "My top back like JFK."
From “Free Mason” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
32. "Fornicated in my fortress, 40K still my mortgage / 24K my toilet, all my taxes reported."
From “Hold Me Back” on Rick Ross, God Forgives, I Don't
31. "Once the bitch needs an oil change, I go and buy a new one 'cause I'm spoiled man."
From “In Cold Blood” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
It's not beyond the self-appointed Boss to rhyme the word “money” with the word “money,” for example, and he happily flaunts tautologies like “A life sentence is a life sentence,” as he does on the song “Cross That Line.”
30. "Two pinky rings, trick it like I'm Nicky Barnes."
From “In Da Box” on Sean Garrett, Courtesy Of
29. "The rumors turn me on, I'm masturbating at the top."
From “Mafia Music” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
28. "Bitch I think I'm Spielberg / I just made a movie."
From “I Wanna Rock” on Rick Ross, The Timeless Audemars Piguet Collection
27. "Middle of December, I will melt your fucking snow."
From “Black Man's Dream” on Rick Ross, Ashes To Ashes
26. "I won't sing to you like Chris and Ne-Yo, but I'm fresher than a stick of deo."
From “Ecstasy” on Danity Kane, Welcome To The Dollhouse
25. "When I decorate a home, marble flowing like the Nile."
From “Magnificent” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap

24. "My Mona Lisa painting on the wall came to life."
From “Play Your Part” on Rick Ross, Ashes To Ashes
23. "Hoppin' out the Bugatti with my Ballys on / No underwear nigga, my jeans tight fitted too nigga."
From “Billionaire” on Rick Ross, Trilla
22. "Multi-millionaire, I had a monster year / We own monster trucks, so yeah we crush ya haters."
From “Birthday (Remix)” by Flo Rida
21. "I'm building a dream with elevators in it."
From “Push It” on Rick Ross, Port Of Miami
20. "Money ain't a thing, just look at my pinky rings."
From “Murda Miami” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
19. "If I fuck you once shorty, you could write a book."
From “Lawyer Fees” on Scotty Boi, Show You How To Do This Part 1
18. "Before I was a fetus, had the genes of a leader."
From “Ashamed” on Rick Ross, God Forgives, I Don't
17. "Time to milk the game, bitch / I went and bought a cow."
From “Addicted To Money” on Rick Ross, The Timeless Audemars Piguet Collection

16. "I hit a lick and went and bought a wing stop (twenty of 'em)."
From “Trap Boomin'” on Gucci Mane, I'm Up
15. "I got houses, hobbies, homes in Abu Dhabi / Never go wrong, GPS in my Ferrari."
From “Living Better Now” on Jamie Foxx, Best Night Of My Life
14. "Took her to the crib, she said it look like an outlet / took my powercord and plugged it into her outlet."
From “Sweet Life” on Rick Ross, The Albert Anastasia EP
13. "I got a house on my neck, my Panamera my pet."
From “Last Breath” on Rick Ross, Rich Forever
12. "I got 'em catching amnesia / time to pull the fucking minks out the freezer."
From “Live Fast Die Young” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
11. "Take my bitch around the globe / Hawaii, hang gliding in the mountains / Shittin' on these hoes."
From “Super High” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
10. "Pinky ring a hundred grand, but keep that on the d-low."
From “I'm Not A Star” on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
9. "Fuck that Aston Mar, fuck with an astronaut / I'm in the Gulf streams, nuts in my acid wash."
From “Money Make Me Come” on Rick Ross, Trilla
8. "So many cars, DMV thought it was mail fraud."
From “Devil In A New Dress” on Kanye West, My Dark Twisted Fantasy
7. "I'm a Mike Tyson type of typewriter sniper."
From “Maybach Music IV” on Rick Ross, God Forgives, I Don't
6. "I scoop Emmy winners like kitty litter."
From “Maybach Music 2” on Rick Ross, Deeper Than Rap
5. "My new crib got its own city limit / Motherfucker got his own city in it."
From Big Sean, “100 Keys”
4. "Pull up in the sleigh, hop out like I'm Santa Claus / Niggas gather around, I got gifts for each and all of y'all."
From “John” on Lil Wayne, The Carter IV
3. "Pull up on the block in a drop-top chicken box / Mr. KFC, VVS's in the watch."
From "Aston Martin Music" on Rick Ross, Teflon Don
2. "I'm a G, my life a movie / I got rubber uzis in my jacuzzi."
From “A Miracle” on Webbie, Savage Life 2
1. "Am I really just a narcissist, 'cause I wake up to a bowl of lobster bisque?"
From Rick Ross, “My Bitches”
Follow Elliott Sharp on Twitter @ElliottSharp for more news and updates.
RELATED CONTENT:
Comments
Add a comment